July 15, 2005
No Drugs. No Hustlers. No Plastic.
Just a reminder of the basic tenets of Grandma's Politician's Club, which is hosting the inaugural gathering of the United Church of Bitchitude and Latter-Day Drunks.
Leave your junk in the trunk and if you're in the mood to pick up some rough trade or a Jessica Hahn look-a-like, please do so after services have concluded, as all good churcified people do. If you doubt me, check out a public park at about 12:30 on a Sunday afternoon.
Another thing: Grandma doesn't take American Express -- or any form of plastic.
"In God We Trust", Grandma told me last night, "Everyone else pays cash." We did a quick walk-through yesterday and my drunk and disorderly friends kept gushing about the selections of bourbon, scotch, whiskey, tequila and rum that Grandma keeps behind the bar.
I simply sipped my Diet Pepsi, occasionally tuning into Dorothy Parker and the Vicious Circle that was on TV (totally by circumstance) while music straight outta Motormouth Mabel's hummed in the jukebox. I watched the stories begin to unfold at our new hangout. It was a glimpse of Heaven on Earth.
So...see you at the meeting house tomorrow night. I suspect you'll either leave sober (yet slightly deranged) or shitfaced (yet strangely at peace).
Whatever floats your boat, honey...
Saturday, July 16
Grandma's Politician's Club
St. Louis, MO 63110
Services begin sometime around 10-11 P.M.