My bike ride was cut short tonight because it started raining. I came home
and since I don't watch anything on the television anymore, I was vexed.
I thought about cleaning, but started looking around my apartment and realized:
I'm a fucking mess.
Regardless of how much time I spend over at Ryan's (whose place is charming
and cute) or Kelly's (who has stuff in plastic tubs and its labeled),
I simply cannot grasp how to get my shit organized. For them, it seems like
everything has its tidy, logical place. Ryan's apartment has this very real
adult aura to it and Kelly is planting flower beds and doing artistic and tasteful
things with stones in his front and back yards.
What I want to know is, where does one logically put thousands of completely
random, totally useless, but incredibly charming knickknacks and fashion treasures?
Sometimes, I'd just love to throw all my shit out. What's documented below
does not even begin to graze the surface of the enormity of the not-good-enough-for-Goodwill
crap that I have.
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BEDROOM
- Found photo canvas of darling, bratty girl
- Saturday's hat
- Lamp (not plugged in)
- Candle
- Loose change
- An old wallet
- Photo-Mount Corners
- Old Gucci knockoff belts that will become sort of necklace someday
- Jingle bells
- Floral tape
- Sunglasses case (2) and one is empty
- Pens
- Gift Certificate
- Broken Vintage Eyeglasses
- More loose change
- Baseball candle
- Eyeball picture frame
- Broken vintage watch (too cute to throw out)
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DRESSER TOP
- 5 thick-band watches
- Business cards
- Vintage Brownie pin
- 5 vintage bow ties
- Mystery OTC pills
- Engraved cigarette lighter (broken or empty?)
- Chapstick
- Found photo of dude with really, scary super long tongue
- More jingle bells
- Super fancy, super sparkly crown brooch
- Hardhat key chain
- Neosporin
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KITCHEN
- After shave-moisturizer
- Flowers for Kelly's birthday present in a Playboy Bunny drinking glass
- Whitening toothpaste
- Pocket knife
- Hair grooming gel
- Sack of nuts
- Ice tea that I made when I got home from work (and forgot)
- Can opener
- Clean(?) coffee pot
- Lid to mystery Glad container
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KITCHEN TABLE
- Vintage hat box - now my makeup case
- Empty Target bag
- Vase of acrylic flowers and one yellow feather
- Light bulbs (new in box) and one loose (no idea where it came from)
- Yellow nubby things for some corsage someday
- My orange biking vest
- Sparkly beads I didn't wear Saturday
- A potholder
- Bag of buttons
- Sales receipts
- Glitter (3 tubes)
- Sinex or some OTC allergy shit
- Bills
- CD - labeled Bionic
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MY OFFICE-WORKROOM
- 3.5' wide orange horse on easel where I've strung:
- Neckties (lots)
- 4 hats
- Angel wings
- 3 fashion man bags
- Moving on...Oh! another hat for a summer day
- The iced tea I made after my bike ride
- Books
- Software (strangely enough...in their sleeves and in their boxes)
- Today's mail
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I think I'll just go scrub my toilet. That's easy enough to do. And fortunately,
the bathroom is not a mess. Yet.
